Hi Tony,
Attached below is my new essay and I tried to apply your comments.
Waiting for your useful comments.
Regards,
Salma
-News editors decide what to broadcast on TV and what to print in newspapers. What factors do you think influence their decisions?
The editors in Media establishments are responsible for editing every thing show through the TV or published in newspapers.
In my opinion, many factors play an important role in their decisions regarding what to broadcast or publish. I believe, that the editors influence by their surrounding environment and this will effect on their choices and decisions. There are three factors on my point of view influence their decisions.
First, personal factor which is play an important role, because the editor has his own opinions regarding many issues. Therefore, these opinions and believes will impact his decisions. For instant, if he interest in politics or economics he will focus in broadcasting or publishing topics about politics an economics issues.
Second, the social factor which makes the editor choose the issues related to his country as well as citizens. Such as discussing the relation between the parents and their children, the impact of using the intern in the relation between peoples, and the drugs effect in the country's future. For example, the TV in UAE focusing in social problems related to UAE society.
Third, politics factor which play the most important role in the editor decision. On the other hand, the editor will take in consideration the political system of the country. Because some countries put barriers in broadcasting and publishing political issues. So the editor will be careful on his decisions regarding any thing show or published on media. For example, in UAE the media don’t discuss the hottest issues such problems between countries because the UAE foreign policy is to have good relations with other countries as well as save the country.
In conclusion, there are many factors beside what mentioned above influences the editor's decisions because his role is to use the media in discussing the important issues which related to his society as well as to educate the people.
OK, then, this essay would merit an 'acceptable' level. It needed more variety in grammar and coherence. The conclusion was disappointing. Nevertheless, it representsa significant improvement on Salma's previous efforts.
News editors decide what to broadcast on TV and what to print in newspapers. What factors do you think influence their decisions?
The editors in media establishments are responsible for editing everything shown on TV or published in newspapers. In my opinion, many factors play an important role in their decisions regarding what to broadcast or publish. I believe that the editors are influenced by their surrounding environment and this will affect their choices and decisions.
As I see it, there are three main factors that influence editorial decisions. First of all, there is the personal factor which plays an important role. This is because the editor has his own opinions regarding many issues. Therefore, these opinions and beliefs will impact his decisions. For instance, if he is interested in politics or economics, he will focus in broadcasting or publishing topics about political and economic issues.
Secondly, it is the social factor which makes the editor choose the issues related to his country as well as its citizens. For example, discussing the relations between parents and their children; the impact of using the Internet on human relationships, and the effect of drugs on a country's social fabric and future development. Take the role of television in the UAE as an indicator of the media's focus on social problems related to UAE society.
Finally there is the political factor which play the most important role in editorial decision making. In this regard, the editor will take into consideration the political system of the country. As some countries put barriers in broadcasting and publishing political issues, therefore the editor will be careful regarding his policy decisions as to what is to be shown or published. As an illustration, here in UAE the media do not discuss controversial issues such as problems between countries because the UAE foreign policy is to maintain good relations with other countries as well as to safeguard the country's interests and security.
In conclusion, this is a complex, multi-faceted issue regarding the limits of editorial responsibility to inform and educate the public. A host of factors come into play, not the least of which is the question of editorial freedom and the journalists' integrity to deal with the essential problems facing his society.
A fine essay, Salma. I had to re-write the conclusion because it 'said' nothing. You have listened to my past criticisms, thank you! I think the 'first' / 'second' / 'third' approach is a bit like you would do in Elementary school - I expect something more polished - especially as you seem to have already started your Master's programme.
Good luck tomorrow
Tony
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1 comment:
Dear Tony,
Thank you very much for your feedback and support. I will work hard to improve my writing even if I pass the exam (in shallah).
Attached below is new essay and I tried to apply your advice.
Waiting for your comments, and can you do me a favor if you evaluate my pervious and this essay as good or acceptable ?
Thanks again for your endless help and support.
-Universities should accept equal numbers of male and female students in every subject. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
There are many differences between the male and female in their trends and interest in the life such as sports, social life, and education. These differences due to their physical structure which is make them different in many thanks. On of the differences shaped in studies trend. So I disagree with the opinion which says that the university should accept the equal numbers of male and female students in every subject.
I believe that study choice is different from male and female. Some studies is suits men more than women such as military studies. These types of studies attract men more than women. For instance, in UAE the majority of the men enroll in military studies more than women. On the other hand, the study type it is depends in the type of work in future. So working in military its difficult for women because it needs special skills such as the ability to work under difficult circumstances during the war and stay away from home for long time.
In addition, studying the aviation also its attract the men more than women. For many reasons women prefer not to study this kind of studies. Because of the conditions of working in this filed. Working as a aviator (pilot) required that the women must be single and this means if the women join this job she will lost when she married. On more thing lead the women not to choose an aviations study is the period of flights which let her be away for long time from home.
In summary, I think it is difficult for the universities to accept the same number of male and female in every subject, because the desire of students either male or female it is decide the number of students in each subject.
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