Saeeda's Enquiry about task 2 + Tony's advice

Hi Tony,

I wanted to enquire about task 2:

In many countries children are engaged in some kind of paid work. Some people regard this as completely wrong while others consider it as valuable work experience, important for learning and taking responsibility. What are your opinions on this?

Below is how I am going to divide task 2

Introduction:
“To stop suffering, we have to stop working” In this essay I intend to demonstrate why I believe children need not to be busy in working in young age but they must go to school.

Be careful! You are confusing 'child labour', which exploits children with 'children working' (= children under the age of 18 doing work for pay to earn pocket money, while they happily go to school and often succeed in their studies).


Body:

The children in this age needs to go to schools to study the basic learning skills.
Example: - Currently most UAE children are engaged in school in this age.

The government should prepare a new Child Protection Act which should be primarily based on children’s interests; therefore, it is also important to find out children’s opinions.
Example in India, children are working and the government does not take an action. The government should sort out this problem through examination these works.
Also, If the children are going to work the government should have enough rights and possibilities been established for children working outside of school.

Still I did not added all the points

Sure, talk about the situation in the UAE, but the essay talks about "many countries" where it is normal and legal for children to do paid work (I used to deliver newspapers and work at weekends while I was at high school - it did not do me any harm at all. Indeed I would argue that it was character building).

Look at the BIG picture!

In conclusion:

Do I repeat myself again in the introduction in different way?

Yes! You reinforce what you stated in the introduction, having proved your case in paragraphs two and three. The conclusion (paragraph four) is the logical outcome of what you said in the introduction which was backed up by ideas, evidence and examples in the two body paragraphs.

Tell the examiner what you are going to say. Say it. Drive home your argument by saying it again (in different words) in the conclusion!

Job done!

Good night all and good luck!

Tony

Saturday 27 January 2007, 00.15 am

I am looking forward for your replay.

Bye